I've been trying to use EFT/tapping each day lately. I'm not sure if I'm remembering to, but I did today with some interesting results.
Before even getting up this morning, I asked myself: What's an issue that's bugging me right now? The first thing that came to mind was that I'm frustrated and confused about how to fit in time to make more money. I lost some of my income recently, I've been very busy with my kids and dealing with my daughter's overstressed/possibly depressed issues and then have all this stuff to do. I haven't been playing Facebook games like I was before the tapping sessions I last posted about though. (Oh, I've played Candy Crush saga twice I think, one of those when I was on the phone with my mother! :P)
So, while I can see that playing computer games was definitely taking away from my time to work on other income sources, I haven't been playing computer games and I'm still not spending time working on these things I know (ok, hope) will bring in more money.
In any case, I assessed my stress level about it as being around a 6--that I was frustrated and confused about how to fit in time to make more money. (Then the random thought came in: Attract it! Now that I think about it, was the thought about attracting more money or attracting more time? Hm...)
I went through a round of tapping. I wish I could remember more clearly what I thought/said at each point so I could share a script here, but I don't. Along the lines of:
The frustration and confusion in my body.
This frustration and confusion
About not knowing how or what to do...
After the first or second round, I questioned myself:
How do I let go of what I don't need to do and how do I know what to let go of? This was in relation to my getting caught up in researching what to do about teen depression, supplements, foods, etc., as well as other things. I assessed the tension level on this one as being a 5.
I got interrupted at this point and had to continue the session a couple of minutes later. When I tuned back in, I felt resistance in my stomach and chest rather than just stress. I forgot to assess the level of resistance. I tapped through this and realized behind the resistance was fear. On that round, I uncovered that the fear was my block, and it was blocking me to keep me safe.
Safe from what? I went through a whole round and didn't know. Then it came to me: success. I was afraid of success. I then thought of one of the videos I had seen with Nick Ortner (I don't remember now if it was through an email they sent or on the tapping site) where he had asked the lady to think back to her earliest memory related to it. Well, mine is from grade 4: I had just moved and while nobody made a big deal of my high marks before moving, all of a sudden, doing well, excelling above everybody else (which I had been doing before but it just really wasn't a big deal) was a bad thing: one boy in particular had an issue with my doing so well and he and his cohorts would harass me because of it. (I can feel the tension in my body now just bringing this memory up again!) I remember for a science test thinking I might have gotten 100%; I went back and deliberately changed one of my answers to the wrong answer. That was how badly the negative comments affected me.
This fear, this tension, it's still in me after all these years. Grade 4... That was 30 years ago.
When I remembered this and started tapping on it, I started crying. There I was, at that point in my ensuite in front of the mirror, tapping away and crying over this!
Does this mean that not finding time (or not making time or not using time) to work on these other things is directly related to this memory? Not necessarily. But it can be one block. A block I'm going to have to work on some more. While I knew I'd carried a bit of the belief that excelling brought negative attention, I did not realize it was in me to the point of causing me to cry!
I didn't do a final tension assessment, which you are absolutely supposed to do (I will get better at this, I hope!), but I felt much better. And since doing that, I've made a quiche for my daughter (with eggs with omega-3 and bacon--she loves bacon and it makes her feel great--and she needs an easy lunch for later and hates sandwiches and is just plain tired of everything else and can't decide anything easily lately), I've gotten the cat litter done, I've written out a list of things to do and gotten this post done. And it's only 9 am. Good start to the day. :)
Have you tried tapping? Care to share your story?
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